Transcribed by Brandon Williams
Transformers: Robots in Disguise
“An Explosive Situation” – Episode 2
Written by Tom Wyner
Truck Driver #1: The night deliveries are killing me. What’s the rush, anyway?
Truck Driver #2: Power company needs this big power cell to back up their computer system.
Truck Driver #1: Well, wake me up when we get there. Huh? What’s that? You must be kidding me. It’s a shark!
Truck Driver #2: Listen pal, I think you better go back to sleep. This night shift really is getting to ya… WOAH!
Sky-Byte: I don’t know why I bother, that was barely enough for a snack. I need more energy and I believe I know where to find it! Hahaha!
Optimus: Koji, we have a Predacon alert! Meet you one block north of your present location.
Koji: One block north of my house. Gotcha, Optimus. I’m on my way there right now!
Optimus: Hurry Koji. This is an emergency!
Koji: Woah, what are you running on, jet fuel? What’s all the commotion about, Optimus? Where are we going?
Optimus: Not far. I’ll explain everything when we get there. Optimus Prime, transform!
Koji: Holy cow! What is this place?
Optimus: This is Cybertron Base, the Autobot’s Secret Underground Headquarters.
Koji: Wow! How many Autobots does it take to run this operation?
Optimus: Our systems are controlled by a proactive Cybernetic interface program. We call it T-AI, which is short for Tactical Artifical Intelligence.
T-AI: Hello Optimus. I see you’ve brought along a visitor.
Optimus: Yes, T-AI. This is my friend, Koji, Dr. Onishi’s son.
T-AI: Nice to meet you, Koji. Any friend of Optimus is a friend of mine. I’m T-AI, Tactical Artifical Intelligence system. Daughter of the Teletraan-1 computer program.
Koji: Nice to meet you too, T-AI. AHH!
T-AI: Sorry, I should have told you. I’m a holographic projection, not a physical entity. I’m a pro-active self-initializing program that constantly scans the entire planet in order to alert the Autobots when it looks like the Predacons are up to something.
Optimus: Take a look at the monitors, Koji. In the past few days there have been reports of over 200 vehicles being attacked on the road. In each case, the vehicle’s battery was stolen.
Koji: But who’d want to steal a car battery?
Optimus: The Predacons. Batteries contain energy and they want as much energy as they can get.
Koji: They’re putting people in danger. Can’t you stop them, Optimus?
Optimus: We’ve tried, but no matter how fast we respond, the attackers are gone by the time we get there.
T-AI: The Autobot Brothers are patroling the highways right now. They’ve been working for megacycles trying to intercept the Predacons.
Sideburn: Whoooweeeee! Just look at that at paintjob! Not to mention those custom wheels. Very classy. Hello you beautiful sportscar! I’d share my garage with you anytime.
Kelly: That guy’s nuts, he’s talking to my car!
Sideburn: You move like a dream and the purr of your engine is music to my ears…
Kelly: Go listen to somebody else’s engine!
Sideburn: Hey, wait a minute! You don’t understand! Can’t we talk about this?! C’mon, have a heart, will ya?!
Prowl: Enough of the fun and games, Sideburn! We’ve got work to do!
Sideburn: All right, I was just taking a little break to, you know, introduce myself!
Prowl: We’re on full time emergency patrol, remember? No breaks allowed until we catch those battery thieves!
Sideburn: We’ve been out here for days and haven’t seen a thing! How are we supposed to find these guys?
Prowl: By covering as much ground as we can, now let’s get back to it.
Sideburn: That little red sportscar could be their next target. I’d better follow her.
Prowl: Ha, as far as I can tell, the only one targetting that little red sportscar is you, little brother.
Sideburn: Hey, a bot’s got to rev up his engine once in a while! Besides, I’m not the only one having fun. X-Brawn is too! Here, check him out.
Prowl: He’s not climbing it for fun. It’ll be easier to spot the Predacons from up there.
X-Brawn: Man, oh man, my poor achin’ tires! You’d think who ever built this here contraption would have at least put in a freight elevator! Prowl, when I get down from here, you’re gonna owe me a new set of shocks!
Sideburn: C’mon, there’s nothing to worry about! Hey, you gotta loosen up, bro. You keep searching like that and your transmission will wear out!
Prowl: You leave my transmission out of this!
Sideburn: Whoa! Hey, come on man… I’m just trying to have some fun! Ha, hey! Watch it!
Megatron: We must find a new source of energy. Our mobile command center has been stuck here in the same spot for too long. The only way we can keep its existance a secret from the Autobots is by constantly changing its location, but our voyage to Earth used up almost all of our energy to power our Transwarp cells!
[Megatron turns around.]
Megatron: If it weren’t for those blasted Autobots, we could easily force the pathetic humans, who inhabit this planet, to turn all of their energy over to us! And then, I would rule this galaxy… And soon the entire universe! Somehow I’ll find a way to get rid of the Autobots and then nothing can stop me!
Slapper: We brought back lots of energy, boss!
Megatron: Excellent! Well done, Slapper! Convert it to energon cubes and recharge the fuel cells. After that, we’ll move the base to a new location. How is this energy being stored and how long will it take to convert?
Dark Scream: It’s stored in little round cannisters!
Gas Skunk: They’re used in something called flashlights and we’ve got thousands of them!
[The three “moron” Predacons laugh.]
Slapper: Great score, huh? ‘Course we’ll have to convert it to energon and that’ll take a while.
Dark Scream: I don’t think it’ll take more than a week or two.
Gas Skunk: Well, three at the most.
Megatron: Silence! We need massive quantities of energy, not little batteries!
Slapper: Sorry, this is all we could find!
Gas Skunk: Anywhere.
Megatron: You have failed me! Beast Mode! Did you really think the energy in these puny batteries would be enough to run this base?
Slapper: Well, yeah. Sorta.
Megatron: Fools! I should add your energy cores to the conversion batch!
Sky-Byte: You’ve wasted your time, Megatron! One of those flashlights is brighter than the three of them combined!
Megatron: Show yourself, Sky-Byte!
Sky-Byte: Certainly! Hahaha!
Dark Scream: Errrr, hey what are you doing here, Sky-Byte?!
[Sky-Byte responds with a growl.]
Sky-Byte: Sky-Byte, terrorize! The good news is that I brought you the most powerful battery the humans are capable of manufacturing. The bad news is even this isn’t strong enough to mobilize the command center.
Megatron: If the fuel cells aren’t recharged soon, the Autobots will discover our location!
Sky-Byte: You need to not worry about that, Megatron. Based on the reports I’ve been monitoring, I believe I know how to solve our problem. Listen to this.
Dorrie Dutton: All of the terrorists have been placed under arrest.
[Megatron shows interest.]
Dorrie Dutton: However, the terrorists’ ultra high explosive device has not yet been found. The device has been hidden inside the engine of a red sportscar, one of the new XE-12 models. All red XE-12’s have been recalled and are being thoroughly searched.
Megatron: High energy?
Sky-Byte: Exactly. If we get our hands on this device, we could dismantle it, extract the energy and convert it for use in our fuel cells. As long as we can prevent the device from detonating, it will give us all the energy we need.
Megatron: Then finding the bomb in that red sportscar is our top priority.
Sky-Byte: The only one left that hasn’t been searched is being delivered to Metro City.
Megatron: Yes, I see, and its exact location?
Sky-Byte: Right now it’s being off-loaded from a ship in the Metro City docks.
Slapper: What if this device is rigged to go off if you try to take it out of the car?
Dark Scream: Yeah, there’s no telling what might happen. Sounds awful dangerous.
Gas Skunk: And if we hit a boo-boo, the bandaids on Earth aren’t big enough for Predacons.
Megatron: Silence you snivelling cowards! Sky-Byte, I’m putting you in charge of this mission. Use whatever means necessary to retrieve that device!
Sky-Byte: Your wish is my command, mighty Megatron.
Kelly: Oh, it’s just what I’ve always wanted! A red XE-12 with a leather interior and a CD player too! All right! Talk about a smooth ride, this baby handles like she was glued to the road! Okay, now let’s she what kind of power she’s got!
Sky-Byte: That human could ruin everything! At that speed, one bump in the road could detonate it and the energy it contains would be lost forever. The car’s probably boobie trapped. I can’t rip out the bomb or it’ll blow. I’ll have to tear the rest of the car apart, bit by bit, until there’s nothing left but the device. Then, a gentle grab and its mine!
Sideburn: Hey sweetie, remember me? Well of course you do!
Kelly: Oh no! Don’t tell me that pest is here again!
Sky-Byte: I didn’t think the Autobots would show up so quickly. I’m gonna have to put my plan into action right now!
Sideburn: Sorry, I thought you were somebody else. But I can see now that you are new around here! Woah, the shine on your chrome is boosting my revs into Red Line City!
Kelly: Oh rats! He’s talking to my car again!
Sideburn: Wait! Where ya going? Was it something I said?! C’mon, give me a chance, will ya?!
Kelly: Get a life, you jerk!
Prowl: Cool it, Sideburn! We’re still on patrol.
Sideburn: The difference between you and me, Prowl, is that I know how to do my duty and find a little way of having fun while I’m doing it!
Prowl: Duty is its own reward, little brother.
[Sky-Byte attacks Kelly’s car.]
Prowl: That’s Sky-Byte, one of the Predacons!
Sideburn: Huh? Oh, of course it is. What do you think I was chasing?
Prowl: Yeah right.
Kelly: Please don’t hurt my new car!
Sideburn: Oh no! Sky-Byte’s about to leave his teeth marks in that beautiful paintjob of her’s!
Prowl: I’ve got to admit, this is the worst case of road rage I’ve ever seen. Predacon, you’re under arrest! Prowl, Jet Boosters! Halt, Predacon!
Sky-Byte: Autobot, I warn you, if you try and interfere with my mission, you’ll suffer the consequences!
Prowl: Prowl, transform!
Sky-Byte: Here’s a tip for you. Never ignore a warning from a shark! Now get out of my way, Autobot!
Sideburn: Sideburn, transform!
Sky-Byte: You chose to ignore my warning. Such ignorance and disrespect will not be tolerated. Ah, I’ll deal with you two later.
Prowl: No way, Sky-Byte. We do this now! Jet Booster Power Fist!
Sideburn: Battle Blade!
Sky-Byte: Well, it’s been fun playing with you two, but recess is over. Shark Missile! Happy Motoring!
Sideburn: Come back here!
Dark Scream: Ha! That’s the car, Slapper! We found it!
Kelly: I must be dreaming… Either that or I should be put in the nearest nuthouse!
Dark Scream: Gotcha!
Slapper: We did it! We got the car!
Sky-Byte: Careful, you clumbsy fools! One false move and that device will detonate and blow all of you into oblivion! I shall take it to Megatron. Now hand it over to me.
Slapper: It’s ours! We found it and we’re taking it in! Get going, guys!
Dark Scream: Let’s go!
Sky-Byte: Get out of my way! That’s no way to carry a bomb. Shaking like that could cause it to detonate! Now hand it over and I’ll fly it to the command center!
Gas Skunk: Hey, you’re not the only one who can fly, tuna breath. Take it, Dark Scream.
Dark Scream: Good thinking, Gas Skunk. Adios Overbite!
Sky-Byte: Try to get it through your thick skulls, neither of you is taking that car anywhere!
Kelly: I just know I’ll wake up any second!
Sky-Byte: I’ve got the bomb!
Sideburn: My beautiful red sportscar! Don’t worry, I’ll save ya!
Sky-Byte: Hahaha! Now that I have the device, I have to deliver it to Megatron.
Sideburn: Oh no! My beautiful sportscar is gone!
Prowl: Prowl, transform! Don’t worry, I’ve gotcha. Sorry ma’am. I do apologize for the inconvenience. Are you all right?
Kelly: For someone who has been attacked by a giant flying squirrel, a huge toad, a maniacal shark and a monsterous skunk… Sure, I’m just fine.
Sky-Byte: Hahaha! This device contains enough power to recharge all our fuel cells. I’ll convert its energy as soon as I reach the command center.
X-Brawn: Think again, hoss.
Sky-Byte: What the?!
X-Brawn: This little chunk of energy’s going with me.
Sky-Byte: You clumbsy Autobot. Now that you’ve handled it so roughly, the device has armed itself! Ha, thanks to your own heavy-handed clumbsiness, you’ll have to give the device back to me. You really have no other choice.
X-Brawn: Says who?
Sky-Byte: It could go off any second! It won’t be dangerous if I fly away with it, but if you keep it, the whole city could be destroyed!
X-Brawn: I didn’t roll off the assembly line yesterday. You just want it back so the Predacons can suck out the energy.
Dark Scream: I have a feeling it’s going to get real unhealthy around here in a minute or two. What do you say we get out of here, boys?
Gas Skunk: You know, that’s the best idea I’ve heard all day.
Slapper: Hey, when you’re right…
All Three Preds: You’re right! Every Predacon for himself!
Sideburn: Dude, I’ve got a bad feeling about this.
Prowl: Yeah, if what Sky-Byte said is true, thousands of lives are in danger. We’ve got to get that bomb away from the city, but we’re almost out of time!
Sideburn: X-Brawn, you’ve got to take that bomb somewhere where the explosion will do the least amount of damage!
X-Brawn: I won’t have time to get very far and we’re right in the middle of the city! Where should I take it? Any suggestions?
Prowl: Take it to the top of the highest structure you can find! The higher it is the less damage it’ll do.
X-Brawn: The highest structure? Right! I’m on my way. Yeehaw! Woohoo! Ride ’em, cowboy! Here we go!
Sky-Byte: Oh no, if that bomb goes off, all its energy will be wasted. Careful, you fool!
X-Brawn: Yeehaw! One more swing oughta do it! I’m almost there!
T-AI: What he’s doing is awfully dangerous. Where is he going with that thing?
Koji: He’s trying to get to the top of that radio tower. Do you have any idea how tall it is?
T-AI: 500 feet.
Koji: Then we better start thinking about a Plan B.
X-Brawn: Made it! Now I’ve just got to get up to the top!
Sky-Byte: It’s no use! Even at this height, it will destroy the city. So hand it over!
Koji: He’s right, X-Brawn, if that thing goes off at 500 feet, the city’ll be demolished!
Optimus: He’s gonna run out of power soon.
Koji: In order to save the city, you’re going to have to take that thing a lot higher. Like into the stratosphere or maybe even farther!
Optimus: Of course! That’s the answer! X-Brawn, hold your position. I’m on my way! Vehicle mode!
X-Brawn: Fine by me to park it right here, Optimus. I’m pum-tuckered out.
Sky-Byte: Well now… Hahaha… You’ve come to the end of your rope. Excellent! Give me the bomb.
X-Brawn: Looks like the calvalry got here just in time!
Optimus: Optimus Prime, transform! Hello Sky-Byte.
Sky-Byte: There’s nothing you can do, Optimus.
Optimus: I beg to differ. Optimus Prime, optimize! X-Brawn, listen up. Switch into robot mode and throw that device as far and high as you can!
X-Brawn: Why sure. A country mile and then some! X-Brawn, transform!
Sky-Byte: Foolish Autobots! I’ll catch up to it in no time!
Optimus: Activate Power Stream targetting mechanism. Locked on. Power Stream, fire!
T-AI: Look, Optimus is using his Power Stream to send the bomb into space! And it’s so cold outside the Earth’s atmosphere that the water covering Sky-Byte will freeze him like an ice cream cone!
Sky-Byte: I’ll get you for this, Optimus!
[Sky-Byte is shot into space.]
Sky-Byte: Huh? There it is! I’ve got to be very careful. The slightest vibration will set it off. I’ll have to use my gentlest bite! Uh oh. I believe I am in — may have been — just a teensy weensy bit too hard!
Optimus: It worked. The city is out of danger. Thanks Koji. We couldn’t have done it without you. It was your idea that saved Metro City. Well done!
Koji: All right! Yahoo! Woaaahh!
Dark Scream: Sky-Byte must have shook a bolt loose in that explosion. Now he’s reading books!
Slapper: What for?
Dark Scream: He says once we understand humans we can trick ’em into giving us their energy!
Sky-Byte: What sort of nonsense is this? “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times?” Best or worst, make up your mind!
Slapper: Does Sky-Byte really think he’s going to understand humans by reading that stuff?
Sky-Byte: “To be or not to be?” This guy can’t make up his mind either!
Slapper: It’s not gonna work!
Dark Scream: Of course not!
Gas Skunk: Humans are all crazy!
[The “Morons” snicker as the show ends.]